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The Miscarried Mother

   
The miscarried mother,
Is full of regret;
Did she forget
Her pills and her potions?
Her miracle lotion?
Did she get enough sleep?
Did someone sneak
Pâté or blue cheese
In her dinner last week?
The doubts creep.

She wants to know why?
She tried to comply,
Didn’t fly, didn’t drink,
Tried not to overthink (!);
Did exercise, a little
Not too much,
Then you’re screwed:
If you want to keep this baby
You’d better be shrewd!
So you have to be watchful,
You have to take care;
No fluoride in your toothpaste,
No bleach in your hair.

She tried her best,
To accommodate her guest;
Did reflexology and stuff,
But it wasn’t enough;
To prevent another evacuee
(It’s always the thing
You don’t expect it to be).

Now it’s too late,
Another month wait;
To try once again,
Ignoring the pain.

Don’t cause a commotion,
Grieve silently alone;
Don’t bring it to work,
Confine it to home;
Don’t let people know,
The ache in your heart;
Save it ’til night,
Alone in the dark.

The miscarried mother
Must be strong.

The pain goes on.

Then you tell a few friends
“Oh, I had one of those too!”
You start to realise
It’s not just you.

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9 Comments

  1. I haven’t seen your blog before but offer you my sympathy. I have had fifteen miscarriages, and the stillbirth of my second son, and know all too well the pain of losing a child. Much love to you, I am off to read more of your blog. #abitofeverything xxx

    • Oh my goodness, I am so sorry to hear that. You must be a very strong lady. I must confess that I have been blessed when it comes to having children and have two young sons. This poem was actually inspired by an evening spent with a close friend who had been having a very rough time. The idea was to offer support. I hope that it does do that. I wish you so much love and luck. Am also off now to read yours! #abitofeverything xx

      • Thank you. I have since been blessed with FOUR a wonderful, healthy children!! We still miss Joseph, always will, he would be nine now and a huge part of our family. I feel sad to think of all of the babies we lost but so happy at those we got to keep. Xxx

      • I was just looking at your blog & thinking, “a happy ending!”. I am so pleased for you. They look like happy little beauties! Four sounds like a lot of work but no doubt your experience helps to keep everything in perspective xx

      • Yes! 11, 3, 2 and 1. We had three babies in just over 2 years! Complete madness but a complete miracle. We are very lucky. Xxx

      • 3, 2 & 1!! I have 2.5 & 10 months. I cannot imagine adding another one in to that mix! As I said in my first comment you must be a very strong lady! Wow!!! Xx

  2. I have been reading your comments as well as this wonderful poem. I too have supported a friend through miscariage. Its great that you are there for her, and that you have been able to put things so elequently in your poem. My own friwnd said one of the hard things was no one wanting to talk about it, just pretending it never happened. Thank you for sharing thia with us, Tracey xx #abitofeverything

    • Thank you so much for your lovely comment and for reading. What I was trying to capture was all the different advice that seems to come your way and how overwhelming it can be. What struck me was that my friend was trying so hard to not have a miscarriage when really it was out of her hands & the not knowing what causes them is so frustrating. I’m glad you liked it xx

  3. xxx xxx

    This is a really good tip especially to those fresh to the blogosphere.
    Brief but very accurate info… Thank you for sharing this one.
    A must read post!

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